Kayla's Nest-Making Process

I knew I had to think like a bird. How do you think like a bird? What do birds think about? I suppose that's partially the point of all this. I tried to clear my mind and reach a zen-like state of birdness. I sought my inner bird in an attempt to let it overwhelm my humanness. I needed to be a bird in all senses but physical.

Didn't work out very well. I think I may not have an inner bird. If I do, maybe it's a dodo. Or a sub-par bird that sucks at building nests. An omega bird. I abandoned that and thought, humans build crazy things. We built the pyramids. We have opposable thumbs. If I think like a human, I can make a better nest.

I started by trying to weave the stuff together in a circle that I could use as a base of sorts. I managed to weave together about five strands before a bunch of it snapped and it fell apart. I wondered, how do birds start nests? It seemed to me that the starting point must be critical. I Googled "bird building nest" but all the time-lapse videos I found showed the nest already in the process of being built.

I realized I was going to need an adhesive of some kind. Didn't want to use honey, that would make a mess. Couldn't use glue, that was cheating. What if birds had glue, though? What if they had opposable thumbs? I bet they would make some kickass nests. That's probably the next stage of bird evolution. I digress. I couldn't use bird saliva. I couldn't use my own saliva because human saliva isn't nearly as useful.

What if I used mud? It was worth a try. I went outside and gathered some dirt from the yard, getting some odd looks from people walking by. Went back inside and added water slowly and carefully, didn't want to make it too runny, then it wouldn't hold anything together. When I was happy with the consistency I scooped it into the box with my hands and began mushing (for lack of a better word) the grass and hay and stuff into my mud base. Compressing it with my hands to make it somewhat round, pressing down the center, raising the sides with my thumbs. I went back and forth, adding materials and mud, and more materials, and more mud, until I had something that was vaguely nest-like. There had been a few rocks in the dirt I gathered, so I placed them in the center, seeing as I didn't have any eggs.

I figured I did everything I could do, so I closed up the box and prayed that it would hold up when the mud dried.

As a result of this whole endeavor, my respect for birds has grown considerably.